A Promise Kept
is a memoir of the author's life as caregiver to her aging parent. She shares lessons learned through keeping a promise to care for her mother at home. The book sheds light on the emotional conflicts of family care-giving and encourages caregivers to find persistence, strength, and wisdom for each day through God's Word. In November, National Family Caregivers' Month, Bonita host a community event to recognize family caregivers in Shreveport, LA. Visit www.bonitabandaries.com
for list of other writings and her schedule.
To make a wise decision, one must be in prayer and trust to receive God's direction. My experiences have taught me that when something is meant to be, all areas come into place and there is peace about the issue. So, study the situation analyzing all factors, seek God's guidance, and be confident of receiving an answer. Often when children need to become caregivers, there has not been adequate planning, if any, to prepare for such events. Whether there has been advance planning or not, there are many questions to be answered. Changing the home and role reversals of parents and children are emotional issues on both sides of the spectrum.
Should I care for my mother in my home or seek an alternative? This question was not easily answered as stated in "The Promise". My mother always requested that the family never place her in a nursing facility. Wanting to honor her request was not easy considering her medical issues. Caring for her in my home would require a different lifestyle for me. At the top of the list of concerns was whether I could do this since I had no experience in caring for anyone with health needs.
Believing that "the Lord would make me wise and show me where to go," I brought Mother to my home to care for her. The decision was formed by God's Word, her desire, and medical advice.
A Duty of Children
Honor your father and your mother, as the LORD your God has commanded you that your days may be long, and that it may be well with you in the land which the Lord your God is giving you.Deuteronomy 5:16 NKJV
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honor your father and mother," which is the first commandment with promise: "that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth." Ephesians 6:1-3 NKJV
Honor your father and your mother . . . Matthew 19:19 NKJV
Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord. Colossians 3:20 NKJV
But if any widow has children or grandchildren, let them fi rst learn to show piety at home and "to repay their parents; for this is good and acceptable before God. 1 Timothy 5:4 NKJV
Bonita Bandaries resides in Shreveport, Louisiana where she was an educator for many years. When confronted with the role of caregiver for her elderly parent, she found no manual to adequately guide her through the emotional turmoil for herself and her mother. A Promise Kept was inspired by these experiences. Often taunted by her mother's "You're just a teacher," the former counselor sought counseling from the Master Counselor, Jesus, described in Isaiah 9:6 as "Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God."